30 Days of Thanks- My Birth Mom

 

The bouquet of red roses is for the amazing lady that I am grateful for today.  Today I say THANK YOU to the woman who is my birth mother.   I have never met her.  I don't know her name, or anything about her.  I take that back... The only thing I have heard about her is that she was a Co-ed at the University of Kentucky in Lexington, and my birth father was a professor.  While that could make an interesting "Lifetime" channel movie, that is all I know.  I have no idea what color her eyes are, if she was tall, if her hair turned gray early, if she likes french fries, if she loves sports, or is anything like me at all.   I have no idea what happened when she told her parents she was pregnant,  if she ever saw my birth father again, if she graduated from Uof K, or what she did the rest of the summer of 1962.  I have no idea if she even thinks of me in June on my birthday or if she has long erased the difficult event from her mind.  I think of her, occasionally. 

I imagine I locate her (perhaps something dramatic like on the OPRAH show, or something less amazing like I just figure out where she is and who she is, because I am pretty good with GOOGLE.)  We chat on the phone and make arrangements to meet.  I fly to Kentucky.   We meet in a public place, (She worries I am a freak, she has seen too many Jerry Springer episodes of bizarre adoption reunion stories)  and we have lunch.   I greet her with a huge bouquet of roses.  I hope she likes them.  I bring her flowers for all the events I have missed in her life, Birthday's, Christmases,  Mother's Day,  you know, all the good ones!  We exchange small talk.  I show her a picture of my kids.  She thinks they are amazing, adorable and sound wonderful.  (Because they are!)  She shares a little about 1962.   She tells me the hard parts.  She is worried now that I will want to be in her life full time.  

The best part is when I just say "Thank you."  I tell her about Hank, and Dottie.  I tell her about how they spoiled me rotten.  I tell her about going to Europe every summer growing up (doesn't everyone?) And I tell her about piano lessons, swim lessons, riding horses, inter tubing down the ditch by my house, sleeping on the trampoline, joining the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, and becoming me.  I tell her I have always wanted to sit at the table, take her to lunch and tell her thank you.  I don't need to be at thanksgiving dinner, I don't need to meet 96 year old Aunt Pearl, I don't need to even meet some brothers and sisters that I may have now.   I only need to say thank you to the woman who brought me here.  I had a mom and a dad.  They were amazing parents and honestly, she should be semi-thankful she didn't have to raise me!!  

The ball is in her court.  If she wants to be a part of my life, I will love this new, amazing woman in my life.  If she wants to walk away and never talk to me again, that is ok too.  She has been through the rough part.  I finally get to look at her.  I finally get to see her nose, her smile and her eyes. I get to bring her the flowers I have wanted to bring her for as long as I can remember, and I get to simply say "Thank you!"  Talk about making a difference, one random woman at a time??  This lady made a choice that let me be here, and get a chance to be me.  Can't ask for anything more than that.   

30 Days of Thanks- Mom and Dad

Hank and Dottie Werner

30 days of Thanks would not be complete without a shout out to my parents.   Hank and Dottie were pretty amazing parents (although I was a pretty amazing child, so parenting had to be fairly simple.....)  I share their engagement picture because I had no idea my parents were movie stars! Seriously, does this picture look like a movie poster?   Earlier on this blog I have shared thanks to my mom., and I have shared some thoughts about my dad as well, but today I share total gratitude for the people who have helped me become who I am. 

In 1962 two amazing people adopted a little cute baby in Lexington, Kentucky.   Hank worked at IBM and Dottie was a stay-at-home mom.  I was told that one morning, while leaning out of my crib to watch my dad shave I did a header out of the crib and landed on the floor and in the hospital.  (So when people ask, "Where you dropped on your head as a baby?" The answer is a resounding, "Yes! Why do you ask?"  

Just a few short years later we are living in Boulder, Colorado living in a hotel while the house gets ready to move in.   Seemingly the TV got a little boring and I did not like what was on, so I took two feet and kicked it over.  I am amazed I am still alive.



For the kid who amazingly survived childhood I am sure my parents questioned working so hard to keep me alive once I became a teenager.  I pushed every limit, whined constantly, begged for stuff, and must have made them look up the adoption agency at least once to see if the return policy had expired.   A quick trip to Tucson, Arizona proved if Hank wanted to kill me he had ample opportunity.  No one would have found my body in the desert, and frankly, no one would have blamed Hank if I "disappeared."  But, he didn't ever kill me, and for that I am truly grateful.

I am who I am because these people raised me. Their blood doesn't run through my veins, but I am their daughter, no doubt about it.  I am as stubborn as Hank, (Who, at 83 refuses to give up driving back and forth from Wyoming to Colorado)   And occasionally as kind as Dottie, who has been gone since I was 17 years old, and taught me to think of others before myself.  I still struggle with that, but someday, I may get there.


Forget the stupid stuff your parents did, heck, we all make mistakes and they were trying to do the best they could.  For Dottie and Hank, that was no easy task.... and I was the GOOD kid!!!    I know not everyone had a great family.  Heck, by some standards mine was pretty screwed up.  But one thing that never failed was that Hank and Dottie loved me.  They still do.   They were the ones who taught me that, even though I am only one random woman, I can make a difference.   So can you..... Being Thankful is one way to truly make a difference.  Will you? 

Random Thankfulness

To truly live up to my "One Random Woman" image, I want today to be grateful for random things. 

• Toilet Paper.... (Awesome product, never really appreciated until you don't have any) 
• Ice Cubes...great invention! 
• Deodorant.... An entire world smells better, what a wonderful product! 
• Vacuum Cleaners.. This fall with my chubby dog dragging in leaves, this is a godsend. 
• Q-Tips.... The entire world would be walking around with clogged ears without this awesome invention. 
• Toothpaste/Toothbrush... Please refer to deodorant... smelling better, feeling better... 
• Headphones...Occasionally the most wonderful thing to drown out noise and let you hear only what you want to here. 
• Popcorn... Imagine movies without popcorn?  What's the point?? 
• Cell Phones.... Ok, occasionally the bane of our existence,   But think about how quickly we can keep in touch with friends and family.  It is awesome to connect instantly with those we love. The world becomes a very small place!! 
• Feminine Hygiene Products.... No explanation necessary
• Hostess Products... Ding dongs, Twinkies, Ho Ho's, Fruit Pies, etc.  Truly an American wonder.  

Please add the random items you are grateful for to our list!!!  There are tons of things that we really don't NEED but we are so grateful to have.   Loving something random is what makes us special!  Go make a difference, one random woman at a time!!! 

Thankful for those who care!

TJ Adams #6 for the Silver Creek Raptors

Yesterday  got some bad news regarding my senior son TJ.  He has a torn ACL and MCL and will require surgery.   This ends a great season as a wide receiver and tight end for the Silver Creek High School Raptors and takes TJ out of his senior season playing basketball.  As you can imagine this was tough news to take.  Surgery is scheduled for later this month.  

The funny thing about getting bad news, you find yourself surrounded by those who love you and support you.  This never ceases to amaze me!  Just when you feel at your lowest and struggle to find your way, people come out of the woodwork to assist.  Isn't this a  great thing??  When we show love to our fellowman, we show love for our Savior.  This is the path that we have been shown. 

Years ago, in an LDS General Conference Rex D. Pinegar shared a great message on  love.

http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=32a1d0640b96b010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD

This message is as valuable today as it was in 1978.  Yesterday, as we shared the news friends came out to share love, hugs, and words of encouragement to us.  I even called old friend Raegan Scott Pebley, who is the head women's basketball coach for the Utah State Aggies to ask her advice.  She walked me off the ledge and gave me hope and peace that things happen for a purpose and that we are all here to learn and grow.

What am I thankful for?  How can I not be grateful for the outpouring of love, support and prayers for my son?  How can I not appreciate all the prayers offered on his behalf?  How can I not be reminded to  help another every chance I can?  The words of consolation don't take away the sadness from my son, but the words offer hope to prepare for  the future, and to be ready to take on anything that comes his way.  The words of love and support help me remember that my Savior Jesus Christ loves each one of us, knows our trials and our sorrows and finds ways to comfort us with the other travelers on this journey.  

Make that phone call to a friend today that keeps popping into your head.  Stop what you are doing and hold the door for the frazzled person racing into the store. Smile. Take a few seconds to think of the trials that others carry, and see what you can do to make a difference- then DO IT!   We all can make a difference, one random person at a time!

30 Days of Thanks

www.30daysoftthanks.com

I noticed recently on Facebook many of my friends posting a daily short thought on things they were thankful for.  It is all part of of a campaign for 30 days of thanks, encouraging us to take a second from our busy days and notice all the blessings and what we are grateful for.  I am grateful for awesome people who come up with great ideas to get regular folks off their duffs to make a difference.

So pass it along, share your thoughts of what you are thankful for, get your friends to, and your family, and your co-workers.  Sending positive messages around in this day and age is exactly what we want to do be doing.

I have no idea where to start, I am so thankful for so many things.  So I think we can all agree we are thankful for the big things, our families, our freedom, etc.  So I am going to get little and specific, and share things I am thankful for that might be a bit off the beaten path.  (Because, let's face it, I am off the beaten path.... and doing "normal" just doesn't work for me!!) 

Today I am thankful for bedding.  Yup, pillows, sheets, blankets....bedding.   I LOVE hopping into bed and wrapping myself in my sheets and comforter, and resting my head on my comfy pillow.  I have BED-ADD. It is an illness that affects many of us... I can't sleep with the sheets tucked in.  I feel like my feet are being held hostage and can't move.  My feet are not meant to bend that way.   I hop into bed and quickly kick up the covers and "untuck" them to make a mini sleeping bag around me.  I then prop my pillows all around to create a "pillow canyon" for me to rest in.  It is amazing.  Now, of course, it is a little easier to have BED-ADD when you are single and don't have to share the bed with anyone.  BED-ADD people have trouble sleeping with normal people who keep the sheets tucked in and keep pillows at the top of the bed.   As far as I know, there is no cure for BED-ADD.  

So Thanks, pillows, blankets, sheets ( nice, high count sheets) for making bedtime a comfy place.    Because if we get a good nights sleep its a lot easier to make a difference, one random woman at a time!!!

She Lives!!!

Since I am easily distracted I like to travel.  ( I get bored sitting in one place too long... feels like I am time-out.)
I am off on holiday to St. Louis MO to visit  my awesome friend/sister Julia.  To write the trip off, I am speaking at two different events,  last night at a fireside for the youth in Lake St. Louis, and on Wed. night for the Relief Society sisters in Julia's Lindell ward.   Last night went well, but I am really looking forward to Wed, night, since it is a lot more laid back and I can let my hair down a bit.  ( yea, there will be hula hoops.)


I wanted to share an experience that I had since being here.  I know this has happened to other people, but It has not happened to me so far in my life.... the event of the cell phone flying into the toilet.   Yup, there I was, in the ladies room at DIA (Denver International Airport) and my Iphone jumps out of my pocket and goes head first into the toilet.  It is as if she was committing Isucide, that I had used her so much that leaping into a watery death looked like the only alternative.  How could she do this to me???  I loved her!!!  She was my constant companion- The last one I spoke to  in the evening and first one I spoke to in the morning.  I took her everywhere with me.  I thought we had something good together. 



I did what any friend would do to save the life of their buddy, I dove in the toilet right after her.  I swooped in and pulled her from the jaws of death and began emergency procedures to save her life!  I grabbed the seat covers and wrapped her in them.  I hugged her, and tried to keep my sobs silent so the other patrons in the ladies room would not worry about what was happening in our stall.  She blinked, she flashed, I tried to turn her off but nothing would work.  I put her in my backpack, and boarded the plane.  I was now heading out of town alone, suddenly my joy was overcome with grief.  What would I do without her?  She knew everything about me, my children's phone numbers, my work information,  all my life was wrapped up in her little, shiny black world... how unfair of her to take it with her!!!

I arrived in SL save and sound and my sweet companion was still not with me.  I shared my story with Julia, and we put her safely in a blanket of rice, hoping to dry out the water, that she may live again.    That night, Julia suggested we say a prayer for my little phone.  I was pretty sure that God was not going to bring my phone back to life when I had been so thoughtless, and stupid by endangering her keeping her so close to the water.  Julia insisted and she shared a sweet prayer asking for life to come back to my little friend.   As I said my prayers that night, I thought of his power and his ability to move mountains.  He certainly could restore health to my phone, I just needed to have faith.  It  wasn't weird or dumb to pray for things that were important to me.  He is my Father, for heaven's sake, he loves me and is interested in everything that I am interested in. 

The next morning we awoke and got ready for church- Julia asked if I was going to try my phone.  I was afraid to look, but picked her up and turned her on.  After a couple of minutes, she came back, first the small apple sign, then another picture, than my entire screen.  Then the beeps came, new email, new text, new voicemail,!!!  She Lives!!!  She is back!!!  My sweet baby phone lives!!!!

Why do I share this story of what a huge dork I am and how addicted to my phone I am?  Because I am so grateful for a friend who has such amazing faith.  I am so grateful to have a sister who knows my weirdnesses and loves me inspite of them.  I am so grateful to have prayer in my life and to get little reminders of how much our Father in Heaven loves us and is interested in our lives.    It's so true, we all make a difference in this world, one random cell phone at a time!!!

Where the heck have you been?

I can't believe it's been so long since I have written!  So much has happened that I don't even have a clue where to begin, so I will forget it, and just start fresh!! 

This weekend has been another LDS Conference weekend, full of inspiration and a spoonful of guilt to motivate me to action.  (See, I am writing in my blog....must be working!) There are a few things I have chosen to work on so that I can continue on that journey to becoming a better person.   

Today I think of the random people who are making my life so awesome right now.  

My Family- Erin, John, Bodie, Brynlie,Brycen, Mike, Christine, Kelly, Levi, TJ and Travis. (wow, I am the Waltons...) You are the frosting on the cake of life.  

SCLA (Silver Creek Leadership Academy) I work with the most amazing people ever.  Joylynn, Jean and Lauren have the 9th grade program kicking it.  Thank you for being amazing. 

Longmont Stake RS- Janet, Brenda and Cecelia... were still here, and I am thrilled.  You are dynamic women. Thank you for your amazing example. 

Silver Creek HS- Principal Sherri Schumann has recently announced her retirement. She will leave a gaping hole in the middle of the hearts of the entire staff.  I doubt any Principal cares more about their school than Sherri does.  The shoes to fill are huge. 

The amazing, random people who touch my life and make it rich and full.  Eutslers and the gang behind the kickball tourney, all the folks I work with at SCHS, Brandon's Mom, Brenda, for your grace, strength and amazing faith, The football family, my amazing friends, random strangers who make a difference... all of you.  


Thank you for making my life rich, and so worth living.  It is really true- we can make a difference- one random person at a time!!